Well, I lost the Trivia Contest at our country club last night by 1 point.
Not only got the last question wrong, but was immediately asked to leave.
The question was: “Where do women have the curliest hair?”
Apparently the correct answer is Fiji.
Category Archives: Women
Good to the last drop
A 98-year old Mother Superior from Ireland was dying. The nuns gathered
around her bed trying to make her last journey comfortable. They tried
giving her some warm milk to drink but she refused it.
One of the nuns took the glass back to the kitchen and remembering a
bottle of Irish whiskey received as a gift the previous Christmas, she
opened it and poured a generous amount into the warm milk.
Back at Mother Superior’s bed, she held the glass to her lips. Mother
drank a little then a little more. Before they knew it she had drank
the whole glass down to the last drop.
“Mother,” the nuns asked with earnest, “please give us some
wisdom before you die.”
She raised herself up in the bed and whispered, “Don’t sell that
cow.”
Women are so smart!
A woman was out golfing one day when she hit the ball into the woods. She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap. The frog said to her, “If you release me from this trap, I will grant you three wishes.” The woman freed the frog, and the frog said, Thank you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes.
Whatever you wish for, your husband will get times ten!” The woman said, “That’s okay.” For her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the world. The frog warned her, “You do realize that this wish will also make your husband the most handsome man in the world, an Adonis whom women will flock to”. The woman replied, “That’s okay, because I will be the most beautiful Woman and he will have eyes only for me.” So, KAZAM-she’s the most beautiful Woman in the world! For her second wish, she wanted to be the richest woman in the world. The frog said, “That will make your husband the richest man in the world. And he will be ten times richer than you. ” The woman said, “That’s okay, because what’s mine is his and what’s his is mine.” So, KAZAM-she’s the richest woman in the world! The frog then inquired about her third wish, and she answered, “I’d like a mild heart attack.”
Moral of the story: Women are clever. Don’t mess with them.
Attention female readers: This is the end of the joke for you. Stop here and continue feeling good.
Male readers: Please read the rest of the joke.
Continue reading Women are so smart!
Cheerleader face plant
Knicks Cheerleader Flip Fail – Watch more Funny Videos
I already know what time it is!
My neighbors, the two cute, young, lesbians next door, asked me what I would like for my birthday.
I was quite surprised, when they gave me a Timex! It was very nice of them, but I’m pretty sure that they misunderstood me, when I said, “I wanna watch!”
Don’t mess with Granny!
The midgets needed to do more cutting!
I found this image over at EatLiver.com.
Daddy, How was I born?
A little boy goes to his father and asks ‘Daddy, how was I born?’
The father answers, ‘Well, son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway! Your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on Yahoo. Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber-cafe. We sneaked into a secluded room, and googled each other. There your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive. As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, and since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later a little Pop-Up appeared that said:
You’ve Got Male!
Why Republican men are happier
Don’t piss off a woman
One evening a husband, thinking he was being funny, said to his wife, ‘Perhaps we should start washing your clothes in ‘Slim Fast.’ Maybe it would take a few inches off of your butt!’
His wife was not amused, and decided that she simply couldn’t let such a comment go without a punishment. The next morning the husband took a pair of underwear out of his drawer. ‘What the Hell is this?’ he said to himself as a little ‘dust’ cloud appeared when he shook them out.
‘Alice!’ he hollered into the bathroom, ‘Why did you put Talcum Powder in my underwear?’
She replied with a snicker, ‘It’s not talcum powder; it’s ‘Miracle Grow’!!!!!’