Sep 212015
 
  1. Mexican tap water
  2. A porcupine with a “pet me” sign
  3. Bill Clinton, with my teenage daughter
  4. A fart while fighting the flu
  5. An elevator ride with Ray Rice
  6. Taking pills or a drink offered by Bill Cosby
  7. A Bigfoot sighting
  8. A Hillary Clinton war story reported by Brian Williams
  9. Gas station sushi
  10. Jimmy Carter, with the economy or military strategy
  11. A Palestinian on a motorcycle
  12. Pete Carroll coaching decisions
  13. Eating an apple from an orchard at Fukushima reactor #4
  14. Hitching a ride from a guy in a goalie mask
  15. The ingredients in a hotdog
  16. Nancy Pelosi’s grip on reality
  17. Black Ice
  18. Jerry Sandusky as a Boy Scout leader
  19. Alien abduction stories
  20. Barney Frank in the shower asking you to pick up the bar of soap
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 Posted by at 8:46 pm
Feb 102014
 

justin bieber news

Absolutely nothing which requires use of the names Justin Bieber, Kim Kardassian, or Kanye West is news, unless it is followed by the words “Discovers the single unifying theory.”  And that will never happen.

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Apr 102012
 
  1. Name something a blind person might use – A sword
  2. Name a song with moon in the title – Blue Suede Moon
  3. Name a bird with a long neck – Naomi Campbell
  4. Name an occupation where you need a torch – A burglar
  5. Name a dangerous race – The Arabs
  6. Name an item of clothing worn by the 3 musketeers – A horse
  7. Something you open other than a door – Your bowels
  8. A food that can be brown or white – Potato
  9. A jacket potato topping – Jam
  10. A famous Scotsman – Jock
  11. Something with a hole in it – Window
  12. A non living object with legs – Plant
  13. A domestic animal – Leopard
  14. A part of the body beginning with ‘N’ – Knee
  15. A way of cooking fish – Cod
  16. Something that flies that doesn’t have an engine – A bicycle with wings
  17. Name a famous bridge – The bridge over troubled waters
  18. Something a cat does – Goes to the toilet
  19. Something you do in the bathroom – Decorate
  20. Name an animal you might see at the zoo – A dog
  21. Something associated with the police – Pigs
  22. A sign of the zodiac – April
  23. Name something that floats in the bath – Water
  24. Name something you wear on the beach – A deckchair
  25. Name something Red – My cardigan
  26. Name a famous cowboy – Buck Rogers
  27. A number you have to memorize – 7
  28. Something you do before going to bed – Sleep
  29. Something you put on walls – Roofs
  30. Something in the garden that’s green – Shed
Apr 122011
 

The most famous drink named after a professional athlete is the “Arnold Palmer”. It is half unsweetened iced tea, half lemonade. It is named for the golfer whose love of the concoction made it popular.

But are any other drinks named for athletes? Yes. Many, in fact. And unlike an Arnold Palmer, they’re all alcoholic drinks.

Consider trying all 14 for your next party!

JOHN DALY

Directions: Pour 14 cans of Busch Light into a bucket. Garnish with chicken wings.

BEN ROETHLISBERGER

Directions: Make a Sex On The Beach. Chase with a vigorous legal defense.

ALEXANDER OVECHKIN

Directions:Add one completely unnecessary shot of vodka to any drink.

TIM TEBOW

Directions: Fill a pint glass with vodka. Set aside for sterilization of circumcisions. Now pour glass of ice water and serve.

JOHN CALIPARI

Directions: Fill a champagne flute with champagne. Now vacate the champagne and sell the flute to the highest bidder.

LANE KIFFIN

Directions: Start making a martini. But quickly throw that out and make a margarita instead.

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