Tag Archives: nun

Cabbie and the Nun

A cabbie picks up a Nun. She gets into the cab, and notices that the VERY handsome cab driver won’t stop staring at her. She asks him why he is staring.  He replies: ‘I have a question to ask, but I don’t want to offend you.’

She answers, ‘ My son, you cannot offend me.  When you’re as old as I am and have been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just about everything.  I’m sure that there’s nothing you could say or ask that I would find offensive.’

‘Well, I’ve always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me.’

She responds, ‘Well, let’s see what we can do about that:  #1, you have to be single and #2, you must be Catholic.’

The cab driver is very excited and says, ‘Yes, I’m single and Catholic!’

‘OK’ the nun says.  ‘Pull into the next alley.’

The nun fulfills his fantasy with a kiss that would make a hooker blush. But when they get back on the road, the cab driver starts crying.

‘My dear child,’ said the nun, ‘Why are you  crying?’ Continue reading Cabbie and the Nun

SISTER MARY ANN’S GASOLINE

Sister Mary Ann, who worked for a home health agency, was out making her rounds visiting homebound patients when she ran out of gas. As luck would have it, a Texaco Gasoline station was just a block away.

She walked to the station to borrow a gas can and buy some gas. The attendant told her that the only gas can he owned had been loaned out, but she could wait until it was returned. Since Sister Mary Ann was on the way to see a patient, she decided not to wait and walked back to her car.

She looked for something in her car that she could fill with gas and spotted the bedpan she was taking to the patient. Always resourceful, Sister Mary Ann carried the bedpan to the station, filled it with gasoline, and carried the full bedpan back to her car.

Continue reading SISTER MARY ANN’S GASOLINE

Good to the last drop

A 98-year old Mother Superior from Ireland was dying. The nuns gathered
around her bed trying to make her last journey comfortable. They tried
giving her some warm milk to drink but she refused it.

One of the nuns took the glass back to the kitchen and remembering a
bottle of Irish whiskey received as a gift the previous Christmas, she
opened it and poured a generous amount into the warm milk.

Back at Mother Superior’s bed, she held the glass to her lips. Mother
drank a little then a little more. Before they knew it she had drank
the whole glass down to the last drop.

“Mother,” the nuns asked with earnest, “please give us some
wisdom before you die.”

She raised herself up in the bed and whispered, “Don’t sell that
cow.”