The new year always brings many resolutions. Many of these resolutions include more exercise and losing weight. If this is your goal, hopefully the following information will assist you. But remember, if you don’t have a partner, you don’t need to worry because there are other options out there for you. For example, a custom sex doll if you should wish to invest in one.
I’d just come out of the shop with a meat and potato pie, large chips, mushy peas & a jumbo sausage. A poor homeless man sat there and said, ‘I’ve not eaten for two days’. I told him, ‘I wish I had your will power’
I got fired on my first day as a male masseuse today.. Apparently the instruction “finish off on her face” didn’t mean what I thought it did.
A woman was out golfing one day when she hit the ball into the woods. She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap. The frog said to her, “If you release me from this trap, I will grant you three wishes.” The woman freed the frog, and the frog said, Thank you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes.
Whatever you wish for, your husband will get times ten!” The woman said, “That’s okay.” For her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the world. The frog warned her, “You do realize that this wish will also make your husband the most handsome man in the world, an Adonis whom women will flock to”. The woman replied, “That’s okay, because I will be the most beautiful Woman and he will have eyes only for me.” So, KAZAM-she’s the most beautiful Woman in the world! For her second wish, she wanted to be the richest woman in the world. The frog said, “That will make your husband the richest man in the world. And he will be ten times richer than you. ” The woman said, “That’s okay, because what’s mine is his and what’s his is mine.” So, KAZAM-she’s the richest woman in the world! The frog then inquired about her third wish, and she answered, “I’d like a mild heart attack.”
Moral of the story: Women are clever. Don’t mess with them.
Attention female readers: This is the end of the joke for you. Stop here and continue feeling good.
Male readers: Please read the rest of the joke.
Continue reading Women are so smart!
Check out the last 20 seconds or so of this video where the male reporter asks his two female reporters, “So, she’s enjoying penis a little bit more?” The brunette is almost dumb struck when she hears the comment and just stares. The blonde is almost cracking up!
Just proves that sometimes the funniest things are said in very serious contexts! I am betting this guy isn’t going to be called up to the network anytime soon!