Oct 312013
 

My ex-wife started taking flying lessons about the time our divorce started and she got her license shortly before our divorce was final, later that same year.

Yesterday afternoon, she narrowly escaped injury in the aircraft she was piloting when she was forced to make an emergency landing in Southern Tennessee because of bad weather. Thank God our kids were with me at the Beach House this weekend. The absence of a post-crash fire was due to insufficient fuel on board. No one on the ground was injured.

She was evidently flying for a meeting that was going to be held at midnight tonight.

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Oct 292013
 

Soft boiled eggShe was standing in the kitchen, preparing our usual soft-boiled eggs and toast for breakfast, wearing only The ‘T’ shirt that she normally slept in. As I walked in, almost awake, she turned to me and said softly, “You’ve got to make love to me this very moment!” My eyes lit up and I thought, “I am either still dreaming or this is going to be a very good day! I love morning sex!”

Not wanting to lose the moment, I embraced her and then gave it my all; right there on the kitchen table. Afterwards she said, “Thanks”, and returned to the stove with her T-shirt still up around her neck. Happy, but a little puzzled, I asked, “Not that I am complaining since I love morning sex, but what was that all about?”

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Oct 282013
 

genie bottleBob and Ralph were fishing on the Irish shoreline when Bob pulled out a cigar. Finding he had no matches, he asked Ralph for a light.

‘Ya, shure, I tink I haff a lighter,’ Ralph replied with an Irish accent, and then reaching into his tackle box, he pulled out a Bic lighter 10 inches long.

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Oct 122013
 

You are on a Horse, galloping at a constant speed.

On your right side is a sharp drop off.

And on your left side is an Elephant traveling at the same speed as you

Directly in front of you is a galloping Kangaroo and your horse is unable to overtake it.

Behind you is a Lion running at the same speed as you and the Kangaroo.

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