Tag Archives: teenager

A message to all high schoolers

  1. Yes, your freshman AND Sophomore years count towards your GPA for college entrance. Screw it up and you’ll work for crap wages your whole life.
  2. No means NO. In every possible circumstance.
  3. Join every sport, every club, every after school activity no matter what the cost. It’s cheaper than bail.
  4. Repeat after me: I am never in that much of a hurry…I am never in that much of a hurry. Now say that every time you get behind the wheel. It will save your life and that of your best friend in the seat next to you.
  5. Don’t do drugs or drink – it is so not worth the trouble.
  6. Don’t get a credit card. You earn it or you live without it.
  7. If I yell at you, it’s because I love you. And also, because you pissed me off. To avoid the latter, don’t be an idiot. And don’t disappoint me. More importantly, yourself.
  8. Make a vivid picture inside your head of every great moment of your childhood. You’ll need those to get through adulthood.
  9. Make snow angels as often as possible. Make a bucket list. Check it off!
  10. Stand up for those who can’t stand up for themselves.
  11. Be always benevolent. Yes, that’s a word. Look it up.
  12. Call me for a ride even if you are so drunk you barely know my number. I’ll probably be mad for a while but I’ll respect you for calling and I won’t kill you. Riding with someone who is drinking will. (PS – remember #5?)
  13. Be a leader, not a follower. Unless you are following the kid with the highest GPA and (s)he is going to a study group, then by all means be a follower!
  14. Love your siblings, even when you don’t like them. Some day you will be trying to get them to take care of me in my old age. If they are mad at you, you are stuck with me.
  15. I’ve been there, done that on more things than you can imagine. I’m not stupid and I know what you are doing. I was once you (times ten).
  16. Work hard at everything you do. Anything worth doing is worth doing well.
  17. Cover it. (Enough said.)
  18. When I tell you to clean your room, do not point at my messy room and raise your eyebrows. I’m trying to raise you to be better than me.
  19. Learn to type; to budget; to spell correctly and to pray. All are equally important.
  20. Never be sedentary. Someday soon you will no longer be able to move like that. Enjoy it.

Mother of a 17 year old girl

The mother of a 17-year-old girl was concerned that her daughter was having sex. Worried the girl might become pregnant and adversely impact the family’s status, she consulted the family doctor. The doctor told her that teenagers today were very willful and any attempt to stop the girl would probably result in rebellion. He then told her to arrange for her daughter to be put on birth control and until then, talk to her and give her a box of condoms.

Later that evening, as her daughter was preparing for a date, the mother told her about the situation and handed her a box of condoms.

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