This humor is probably going to offend 90% of the people that watch this video.
Tag Archives: Jew
Canadian blondes
Three Canadian blondes died and found themselves standing before St. Peter. He told them that before they could enter the Kingdom, they had to tell him what Easter represented.
The first blonde said, “Easter is a holiday where they have a big feast and we give thanks and eat turkey.”
St. Peter said, “No,” and he banished her to Hell.
The second blonde said, “Easter is when we celebrate Jesus’ birth and exchange gifts.”
St. Peter said, “No,” and he banished her to Hell.
The third blonde said, “Easter is a Christian holiday that coincides with the Jewish festival of Passover. Jesus was having Passover feast with His disciples when He was betrayed by Judas, and the Romans arrested Him. The Romans hung Him on the cross and he died. Then they buried Him in atomb behind a very large boulder…”
St. Peter said, “Very good.”
Then the blonde continued, “Now, every year they roll away the boulder and Jesus comes out. If he sees his shadow, we have six more weeks of hockey.”
I found this over at BeerGoggler.
Jewish Sex
No matter what this husband did in bed, his wife never achieved an orgasm. Since a Jewish wife is entitled to sexual pleasure, they decide to consult their Rabbi.
The Rabbi listens to their story, strokes his beard, and makes the following suggestion, ‘Hire a strapping young man. While the two of you are making love, have the young man wave a towel over you. That will help your wife fantasize and should bring on an orgasm.’
They go home and follow the Rabbi’s advice. They hire a handsome young man and he waves a towel over them as they make love. It does not help and the wife is still unsatisfied.
Perplexed, they go back to the Rabbi. ‘Okay,’ he says to the husband, ‘Try it reversed. Have the young man make love to your wife and you wave the towel over them.’
Once again, they follow the Rabbi’s advice. They go home and hire, the same strapping young man. The young man gets into bed with the wife and the husband waves the towel. The young man gets to work with great enthusiasm and soon she has an enormous, room-shaking, ear-splitting, screaming orgasm.
The husband smiles, looks at the young man and says to him triumphantly, ‘See that, you schmuck? THAT’S how you wave a towel!!’
Clinton v. Titanic
Students at a local high school were assigned to read two books, “Titanic” and “My Life” by former President Bill Clinton. One student turned in the following book report, with the proposition that they were nearly identical stories! His professor gave him an A+ for this report:
Titanic: Cost – $29.99
Clinton: Cost – $29.99Titanic: Over 3 hours to read
Clinton: Over 3 hours to readTitanic: The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe
Clinton: The story of Bill and Monica, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastropheTitanic: Jack is a starving artist
Clinton: Bill is a BS artist
Continue reading Clinton v. Titanic
Jewish pilgrimage
A Jewish businessman in Chicago sent his son to Israel for a year to absorb the culture. When the son returned, he said, “Papa, I had a great time in Israel. By the way, I converted to Christianity. “
“Oy vey,” said the father. “What have I done?”
He took his problem to his best friend. “Ike,” he said, “I sent my son to Israel, and he came home a Christian. What can I do?”
“Funny you should ask,” said Ike. “I, too, sent my son to Israel, and he also came home a Christian. Perhaps we should go see the rabbi.”
So they did, and they explained their problem to the rabbi. “Funny you should ask,” said the rabbi. “I, too, sent my son to Israel, and he also came home a Christian. What is happening to our young people?”
And so they all prayed, telling the Lord about their sons. As they finished their prayer, a voice came from the heavens:
“Funny you should ask,” said the voice “I, too, sent my Son to Israel……
NSA James Jones is politically incorrect as well
This just proves that even a retired US General (and National Security Adviser to Barack Obama) can be politically incorrect!