A newlywed couple is on their honeymoon, lying in bed, about to consummate their marriage, when the bride says to her husband, “I have a confession to make… I’m not a virgin. I’ve been with another man.”
The husband replies, “That’s no big thing in this day and age. Who’s the other guy?”
“Tiger Woods,” says the wife.
“Tiger Woods, the golfer?”
“Yes.”
“Well, he’s rich and famous,” the husband says. “I can see why you went to bed with him.”
So the husband and wife proceed to make passionate love. When they finish, the husband gets up and walks to the telephone.
“What are you doing?” asks the wife.
“I’m hungry,” the husband replies. “I’m going to call room service and get us something to eat.”
“Tiger wouldn’t do that,” his wife shot back.
“Oh yeah? What would Tiger do?” the husband asks.
“He’d come back to bed and make love to me a second time.”
The husband puts down the phone, jumps back in bed, and the couple makes love a second time. When they finish, the husband gets up and walks over to the phone.
“Now what are you doing?” asks the wife.
“I’m still hungry, so I was going to call room service.”
“Tiger wouldn’t do that,” the wife says again.
The husband slams down the phone, goes back to bed, and makes love to his wife one more time.
When they finish, the husband is tired and beat. He drags himself out of bed and over to the phone.
The wife asks, “Are you calling room service?”
“No, I’m calling Tiger Woods to find out the par for this damn hole!”
(Shout out to Web Funny where I found this)