10. Greets every Republican with “Sup, loser”
9. This summer, plans to take a George W. Bush 5-week vacation
8. Called Treasury Department asking, “Who do I have to talk to get on the nickel?”
7. Attended health care bill signing in old sweatpants and a pair of Uggs
6. Changed her name to Oprah Pelosi
5. Took a gavel to Mitt Romney’s hair
4. Thinks under her tutelage, she can turn Tim Tebow into an NFL quarterback
3. Ends every disagreement with, “If you’re so smart, how come you’re not Speaker of the House”?
2. Referred to John McCain as “the distinguished jackass from Arizona”
1. Seen exchanging sexy texts with Tiger Woods
Thank you to TheJoker for sending this to me.