Daughter : ” Hey Mom. Me and my boyfriend are just going to my room. ”
Mom : ” OK. Don’t do anything stupid ”
Mom hears her daughter screaming ”BAABBY BAABBY BAABBYY OOHHHH” !!
Mom rushes up stairs
Mom : ”What are you doing !!?!??!!”
Daughter : ”Get out mom, we are having sex!!.”
Mom : ”OHH!! Thank God! I thought you were listening to Justin Bieber.”
Tempted to embark on yet another extra marital affair, Bill was absent-mindedly reviewing the situation to himself in the bar.
“Not worth it,” he muttered. “Never as good as you hoped. Expensive. Drives the wife berserk.”
His friend, who happened to overhear his soliloquy leaned across. “Come now, old son. You know what to expect when you took up golf.”
Q. What is the difference between a Drug Dealer and a Hooker?
A. A Hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.
Q. What’s a mixed feeling?
A. When you see your Mother-In-Law backing off a cliff in your new car.
Q What’s the height of conceit?
A. Having an orgasm and calling out your own name.
Q. What’s the definition of ‘Macho’?
Continue reading Adult Riddles
Here is a little test that will help you decide.
You’re walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children.
Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you…
You are carrying a Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.
Continue reading Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?
A Jewish businessman in Chicago sent his son to Israel for a year to absorb the culture. When the son returned, he said, “Papa, I had a great time in Israel. By the way, I converted to Christianity. “
A woman is in bed with her lover, who also happens to be her husband’s best friend. After they finish having sex, they cuddle for a few moments when the phone rings. Since they are in the woman’s house, she picks up the phone. Her lover watches and listens, hearing only her side of the conversation.
Speaking in a cheery voice, the woman says: “Hello? … Oh, hi… I’m so glad that you called… Really? That’s wonderful… I am so happy for you… That sounds terrific… Thanks… OK, goodbye, Dear.” Continue reading Husband has gone fishing